The way you say my name when you haven’t seen me all day.
The way you throw your arm over my shoulder when you climb in to my bed in the middle of the night.
The way you play and talk to yourself.
The way you pose like SpiderMan.
The way you eat.
The way you drink seltzer.
The way you make your two teddy bear vitamins talk to each other as you eat them every night.
The way you pitch the baseball.
The way you always hit a homerun.
The way you say, “What say?” when you either didn’t hear something, didn’t process it, or maybe don’t like what you heard.
The way you get excited.
The way you think fruit after dinner is a special treat.
The way you get dressed by yourself now.
The way you try to get out of going to sleep by saying, “Mama, I have to tell you something!”
You, just the way you are.
Thank you! There are certainly lovely moments with 3.5 so I expect those to continue :)
I’ve gotten in to the habit of looking back on old posts.
Probably something to do with being 8 months (!!!) pregnant and getting ready to do this parenting thing from the beginning again.
I read through these softly lit, glowing, magical and sweet posts about my darling son.
And I think, “Yeah, I remember that!” and then I think, “Yeah, there is more of a balance of tough times now. No wonder I haven’t written as much.”
But that’s not fair.
To anyone. Well maybe to Emilio who might not want to hear about the tough times when he’s older and wants to hear about his toddler and preschooler years.
I’m here to say. Post 3.5 has been hard.
He’s a wild man who wants to control everything, all the time. And upon realizing he cannot, wants to just let his animal instinct take over. Which can mean any one of the following happens at any point in the day:
Refusal to do anything
Doing the exact opposite about what we talked about him doing
It is a doozy I tell you.
Now, it isn’t like this all the time, thankfully. I feel so successful in our parenting style (Empathetic Limits) when I see how often he actual does listen, gets on board fairly quickly when he doesn’t want to do something, understands the limits when we’re consistent and doesn’t push them any more, and again actually does listen and acts.
But at night, after we’ve all had long days and he flails his legs as we lift him out of the bath, and shakes his head quickly back and forth when it it times to brush his teeth, and leaps around his bed (of course nearly bashing his head against the frame each time) when it is time to lay down and go to sleep, it is tough to maintain a positive approach to parenting. It is tough to not let our own need to just let loose and let out our animal instincts take over.
And so I feel that life after 3.5 has been a lot of balancing. My needs. His needs. My rationale brain. My irrational reactions. What I know works. And what doesn’t take so much work.
Because as something I recently read says, “You know you’re parenting right when it is hard work.”
And parenting a post 3.5 year old is really hard work.
Tell me it gets better after 4!
It is rare that this kid stops.
It is rare when he does that the stopping does not involve super heros.
So when he stopped and wanted to read one of the books we picked up at the library I had to capture it.
Also the guy reading the book is pretty cute too.
Growing another human is tiring.
Helping another human grow outside my body is also tiring.
The good news? I feel like I’m taking so much better care of myself this time around.
I think back to being pregnant with Emilio.
Honestly- I ate like crap (cause I could), and I stopped exercising pretty early on (cause I think I thought I had to), and I was pretty lazy overall. (for a type A personality).
This time -
I’m eating well rounded meals, I’m still green juicing, I’m doing herbal infusions,
But I’m still eating sugar- oh sugar you glorious bastard.
I’m exercising, I’m active with Emilio, so I can’t just be laying around on the couch.
And I’m focused, very focused on achieving a VBAC. So I’m sitting on a ball at work, I’m not laying back on the couch all the time, I’m seeing a chiro, I’m reading Birthing From Within.
I’m hopefully growing a slightly smaller baby too.
And I’m starting to dig in to my fears, the real ones, that maybe I wasn’t so connected with last time. It is kind of scary.
So, in all seriousness. I’m good.
I feel pregnant.
And I only have about 8 weeks left to go.
This is 44 Months.
Running, so much running.
Exploring everything around him.
Climbing on anything he can.
And just generally being a kid.
A kid that brings so much joy, laughs and yes of course a few frustrations- because we are talking about a 3 year old here ;).
I kind of felt like doing the Dora song and dance after Emilio went to bed last night.
We did it! We did it! We did it! Horray!
We had 5 nights just the two of us - we did it!
We played, and we walked Dijjy Dee- we did it!
We hosted a party and had lots of fun- we did it!
We went running and colored and grocery shopped, yeah we did it!
But seriously. A Long weekend- Thursday night to Monday night- with a 6 month pregs Mama in the way too hot for September heat with a full of energy, no more napping 3.5 year old!
But we did it.
Saturday was a little tough- I got the brunt of E missing his Dada, his playmate, but for the most part we had smooth sailing.
We kicked off the weekend with a trip to my Chiro where E loves to build towers and then use my phone to take pictures
Then we ran 1.5 miles to a playground, had some fun and ran home.
And then I needed a nap.
Which I got a little of one later thanks to a new pack of superhero stickers and a fan E thought needed decorating. The stickers were also bought at the same time as an Avengers coloring book. And the theme for the weekend grew from there. E definitely discovered a love for coloring, superheros of course. And this helped Mama get little cat naps in :)
And we both had fun hosting a party for my natural mom’s group - check out E’s decoration of the kiddie pool!
We started every morning with French Toast
and got out every day for walks with Dij
And time in the garden
By Monday evening we had a good thing going and I was so grateful for this time with Emilio. He’s quite the kiddo. That’s for sure.