Blogging our first pregnancy and child rearing, all the ups and downs, tears and laughs and overthinking that not only comes with being knocked up and a new Momma, but with just being me.
My third year as a Mother, getting to celebrate this journey, getting to reflect on who I am now.
As I drove to Yoga on Sunday morning. I smiled. Just driving in my station wagon, car seat in the back seat, windows down. I felt happy. I felt content in my life, in this journey. Happy at where I was, where I’m going and where I’ve been.
To another year of growth, change, joy and memory making.
I’ve been kind of quiet over here, huh?
Sometimes I want to write about how awesome my kid is and how amazed I am at him, daily. Especially his verbal abilities and his memory. But I don’t want to come off in a way that makes other Mamas feel less than.
Then, I want to write about how challenging this journey can be sometimes. How I got angry when Emilio won’t take a nap or go to sleep at night. But I know I’m not angry at him, I’m angry at myself. Or just tired. Usually just tired. But I feel like I do plenty of that here.
Or, I want to share the sweet moments I so cherish, like when he asks for me first thing in the morning and just cuddles in to my neck. But does that make it seem like I’m trying to mask our experience as picture perfect?
And then I want to just tell you about our weekend. But I don’t want to be boring.
Then I think about what to share, what’s new or cool or interesting. And I realize that while Emilio keeps changing, and our lives keep changing, there is more of the same. There is a little less rapid change and growth and a little more just, “Wow” at being a parent to this kid.
We were at a playground yesterday and Emilio was climbing up stairs meant for 5 year old kids (so there was a good bit of “throw my body half way up and just pull”) and doing the slide. Again, and again, and again. I didn’t have to help him. I didn’t have to hold his hand. He just kept doing it.
And that’s parenting too, right? You realize you get to places where you don’t have to hold anyone’s hand. You may have to throw yourself up and hope you can pull the rest of the way. But, you can go down the big slide. So you just keep doing it. Looking for that smiling face at the bottom.
Lately- it’s been all about the evening walks I get to take with my guy.
And working for the weekend.
Looking forward to more balance to come.
For now, I cherish the moments I have and am thankful for opportunities afforded to me.
And, Emilio? Today in the grocery store we kept running in to a 9 or so month baby girl and when we walked by her at one point he looked up at me and said, “I need to give her a hug.”
That’s Emilio, at this moment.
NH for an impromptu long weekend. Farms, and fire places. Brewery tours and cappuccino. Feet up and fun with Dadda. File under: I wish we lived closer.
Sometimes he needs a little technology (iPhone games) to keep him quiet, happy and at the table. Sometimes no matter what he’s a toddler on the loose in a restaurant “run all around, yell, fall in the floor, but still charm other people!” But we try, as much as possible to keep him happy and engaged without tech.
You want to get a little wet but sit happily in my lap for 15 minutes? Win win!
You’re 2! Wow. And quite a 2 year old you are. You shine such a bright light on the lives of the people around you. You are warm, welcoming, funny, smart and thoughtful.
You love to laugh, dance, sing and cuddle (for a few seconds at least).
You are so self assured and confident. You are who you are with no qualms. It is so refreshing to see. I know some of it will fade, regardless of what we encourage as your parents, and I will continue to bask in it now. As zany as you get, I eat it up.
You recently started saying, “Bless you, Mama” when I sneeze. Out of nowhere. Sweetest. We don’t really request that you say “please” and “thank you”, we just use them appropriately and hope you’ll understand their meaning and then use them appropriately on your own. And you do. And it is so sweet. Even at 4 AM when you want to nurse and are telling me, “Milk Mama, Milk, Pleasssse.”
We had quite the month as we celebrated the holidays and then geared up for your Birthday which we celebrated with a party and together as a family on the actual day.
It was busy, and we were together a lot which was wonderful.
As you continue to grow your language skills in leaps and bounds it gets even more fun to do things together and then talk about them later. Your comprehension and memory continues to astound me.
It all just keeps getting better. There are still moments when it is really hard. And moments when I think, “When does it get easier?” (I know it doesn’t, it just changes). Overall though, man it is awesome. You are awesome.
And now, we keep on growing together.
I love you Milio,
My 2012 in review. From baby to toddler. In a year. Really, less. This year was about transitions and growth.
From walking to running
Words to sentences to conversations
Holding objects to imaginative play
Flipping through books to sitting and reading or being read to
Going with the motions to understanding what is coming next and remembering what has happened, and telling us.
I’ve seen a life grow before my eyes.
Trippy (that’s for you Mom) and wonderful, and crazy, and a privilege.
And hard work.
There have been tears, and I’ve had difficult moments.
It has been a great year. I’m exhausted and so fulfilled. And so happy.
I continue to hold dearly to and enjoy every moment, as much as I can. And I look forward to all that is ahead of us.